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Beth Ditto, in all her… err… hot.. err well. Nevermind.

Filed under News/Band and Industry Gossip and News/Mean-spirited Humor by s.alex.solarte

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Source - ONTD

Beth Ditto performed tonight at the Glastonbury Festival in Jolly Ole England. Now, many of us heavier set listeners praise her to be the second coming of dearly departed Mama Cass. Hell, she even has the tattoo to prove it. But what is it about her that makes scenester, fagsters, hipsters, and poseurs alike indiscriminately drawn to her? And no, it’s not gravity! (though a very good theory I hadn’t really thought of)

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It’s because she is lesbian ELVIS! And let me tell you, bitch don’t give a fuck. There is a reason she was named NME’s hottest woman of the year. And it’s not only because she can wail. Though sometimes alarming, Beth Ditto is what many women and most Rubenesque boys could only dream of becoming. Watch as she takes off her panties and returns it to the crowd after properly soiling it for authenticity. There is no containing this woman and unfortunately sometimes her antics do overshadow her fellow band mates in the Gossip, but god help me, who couldn’t love this train wreck!?!

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Is it just me or does the bodyguard what a piece of dat ass arse. Since she is in England. Duh. Too bad she doesn’t play ‘doctor’ with breeders. Sigh, now whose got me crumpets and tea. CRUMPETS AND TEA!

14 Comments »

Comment by the_fifth — June 25, 2007 @ 8:28 am

god damn…dont you have any hot naked photos of beth, so that the superstarcastic’s musical elite can ya know…maybe…increase the fantasy of spending the night with the girl who combines the fat-elvis & mama cass into one splendid physical form?

Comment by hotshotrobot — June 25, 2007 @ 10:43 am

Please, one of the female SSC writers, i beg you…start making posts about how Frank Black or Bob Mould are huge fatasses, whether or not you think it makes them “sexy.”

Comment by joiezabel — June 25, 2007 @ 10:46 am

oh good lord. my eyes! it burns! the goggles do nothing!

(extra points if anyone gets that reference, luvs…)

Comment by s.alex.solarte — June 25, 2007 @ 10:52 am

SIMPSONS! Thats a simspons reference! so how many points do i get, and are the points redeemable at the local costco? because i got a hankering for a ten lb bag of trail mix that i have been eyeing for a while now!

Comment by hotshotrobot — June 25, 2007 @ 12:31 pm

I use that reference all the time, Joie. Make me work for my points!

Comment by Christine — June 25, 2007 @ 3:02 pm

Re comment #3–DJ, that’s a GREAT idea.

In the meantime, I’ll be over here, waiting for lesbian Elvis Costello.

Comment by s.alex.solarte — June 25, 2007 @ 5:39 pm

re comment #6

What? do you mean comment # 2 ? because i think that would be more applicable. But Elvis Costello has been on the Simpsons. And well, he does make sweet sweet nerd love to women, so i guess in theory he is a lesbian. LESBIANS, FTW!

Comment by Commissar Startastic — June 25, 2007 @ 9:35 pm

I have a rather controversial view on things such as this. I have no problems with self-esteem, but when you are medically obese, as I am going to venture Ms Ditto is, its a PROBLEM. I think its kind of dangerous to view a life threatening health issue as ‘empowerment’.

Then again, on several occasions I have celebrated certain celebrities’ drug habits (GO GO, GO JOHNNY THUNDERS) , so who am I to cast the first stone?

Comment by Christine — June 26, 2007 @ 4:05 am

Alex: oops, can’t type/read, meant no. 3.

Comment by the_fifth — June 27, 2007 @ 8:34 am

Come on seriously! We can’t get all preachy on the medically obese bandwagon on this site. FIRST off, we have another article on here about Amy Winehouse and her constant need to run to the bathroom so as to make sure “her nose is still in place”. (IMHO Ms. Winehouse’s morbidly too thin & frail to physically produce those deep-ass vocals, she’s obviously doing a Milli Vanilli with a 300lb African American Gospel singer).

anywho, we say…”don’t make fun of Beth ditto she’s got a fatass problem” but then we don’t jump on the Nancy Regan on Diff’rent Strokes “Just say no!” band wagon for Amy winehouse?

drugs are fun…but being fat is NOT fun.

as a semi-overweight gay man (and I’m not even CLOSE to obese, Joie has made this part of my daily affirmation) I’m very happy to see REALLY fat people out there showing off what god gave them to all the paparazzi that will dare expose their lenses to it, because they make me look thin by comparison!

so I say to you, we need more obese rock stars & actors! This would help give America (especially middle America, I’m looking at you Indiana & Missouri) the self-esteem boost we need to bring peace to the Middle East.

Comment by hotshotrobot — June 27, 2007 @ 8:50 am

Well, it’s obviously time for a Tad resurgence then!

Comment by literati — June 27, 2007 @ 8:58 am

It has ALWAYS been time for a Tad resurgence.

I found this blog that looks legit, and says he’s starting a new band. Here’s hoping!

Comment by angie — June 27, 2007 @ 10:37 pm

Wow. I wish I hadn’t seen that photo of her taking off her panties. You know, she had another pair on underneath… that’s not very edgy.

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