This is kinda rich. The Rolling Stone “Rock n Roll Daily” blog/newswire/whatever took a shot at Pitchfork yesterday by doing what music journal readers worldwide have b
een doing for years–expressing indignance over some douchebag’s year-end faves list (in this case, Pitchfork’s Top 100 Singles of 2006).
I’m not sure what’s funnier here–a mainstream corporate rag that champions watered-down horseshit year in and year out implying that they know something, anything, about quality music, the claim that Pitchfork’s list is otherwise “quite well-conceived,” or the photo of Joanna Newsom that accompanies it. Um, dudes? I’ll admit freely that i have not heard a note by this woman and am only aware of her because other people talk about her like she’s some sort of hot shit, but i think i can safely say that after seeing this photo, i don’t want to hear anything. Wtf? Someone alert that shrewd and knavish sprite called Robin Goodfellow that some chick stole his hat.
Anyway, it’s amusing to me to see the music journalism equivalent of conservative wingnut Michael Savage calling out the fringe of the left wing as “lunatics” when he himself is about three tiles shy of a Scrabble set. Does anyone think either of these publications know what’s up? Pitchfork’s number one single is by Justin Timberlake, for fuck’s sake, and i’m sorry–i realize there’s some sort of weird po-mo “indie kids like mainstream stuff too!” pro-J-Tim movement out there, but it’s totally lost on me. (And cripes, in their Top 50 albums list they don’t even mention the Melvins’ (A) Senile Animal. I mean, come ON.) Meanwhile, Rolling Stone’s pick is apparently “Crazy” by That Band That Did “Crazy.” Daring! (And they put friggin’ Wolfmother at #15 in their top albums. Wolfmother. Led Friggin’ Sabbath. And…checking…yep, no Melvins here either. But wait, Thunderbirds are Now! made the top 50? Oh god, i hope this doesn’t mean they started sucking. Wait, Thunderbirds put a record out this year? Shit, i just learned something from Rolling Stone. I’d better end this post before my head implodes…)
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Is it just me, or is indie music better rated by album rather than song? And singles? When was the last time you bought a ’single’
austin texted me the following several weeks ago:
” ‘Monkey and Bear’ by Joanna Newsom makes Bjork seem lucid and rational.”
just think about that.
No doubt. Is there a single indie label that releases “singles” off their albums anymore, anyway? That term has precious little meaning anymore. I mean, punk labels still put out 7″s, but i’ll bet a shiny Wisconsin State Quarter that no 7″ single released this year was on that list.
M’ris–good god. I guess that explains Joanna’s penchant for animal-shaped fashion wear, though. One question answered!
With all the kiddies buying crap off iTunes or downloading it through the p2p client of the week, I think making a list based on singles makes sense.
I find it funny that RS chose one track to pick on Pitchfork over, when they apparently enjoyed the rest of the list. It’s like, “Crap, we can’t say we like Pitchfork’s list! Let’s find the one thing that’s stupid!”
uhhhh… we put out singles. and splits. and all sorts of weird crap like that. (on really pretty 2 color vinyl, too.)
…but who the hell istens to us.
tho, i guess when i think about the slimewave series, it’s not from bands that already have albums with us. and i guess we don’t really do it all that often.
AHH SWEET JESUS GOD NO.
Joanna Newsom is not even music. You hear me? Not. Even. Music. I would rather sit through several consecutive days of the entire Merzbox cranked up to 11 than hear another SECOND of her keening, cloyingly precious, pickax-made-of-bile-and-confectioners’-sugar-being-driven-directly-into-my-cochlea GARBAGE masquerading as songs. She’s not only awful, she makes me VICIOUSLY ANGRY (can you tell?).
How on earth Joanna Newsom is out and about, topping year-end best-ofs and selling out 1000+ capacity shows, while my infinitely more talented & listenable/less offensive friends continue to trek 400 miles to wind up with 8 paid and no exposure outside their hometowns? That is far, far beyond the scope of any comprehension I will ever have.
Also, that hat is effing disgusting, and I want to punch her in the face. Repeatedly. And not just for wearing the hat.
Also-also, I have heard like 5 songs on that entire Pitchfork list, and thus continue to resent people saying, “Oh, like, Pitchfork kinda stuff?” when I tell them I like indie rock. I will, however, defend J. Timberlake’s first record to the death.
…but who the hell istens to us.
M’ris, this is in no way any kind of shot being aimed at you guys, but the day Pitchfork or most other indie rags start paying attention to Relapse, or Ipecac, or other unhip labels (because if you don’t release some sort of easily-digested indiepop, you are unhip), i will eat Joanna’s hat.
i am 300% certain that “Marissa working for a “hip” record label” is one of the signs of impending armaggedon.
stephanie - i agree. someone out there in record-label land signed a woman WHO WEARS DEAD DEER ON HER HEAD. not even a hat made out of deer. THAT IS JUST A DEAD ANIMAL PLUNKED ON HER SKULL. you know where you’re most likely to find people that do that sort of thing? IN THE PINE BARRENS. WITH THE CRAZIES. y’know who do not get record contracts? CRAZIES FROM THE PINE BARRENS. (but if the jersey devil ever did a venue tour, you bet i’d show up to see it.)
M’ris, you should be writing for us. I wonder if that would constitute a worse conflict of interest than “dude in touring indie-noise band writing for music blog.”
Joanna Newsom = teh boring.
It sounds exactly like you would expect it to sound.
hilariously enough she’s the cousin of the mayor of SF though, which is kinda funny.
Pitchfork’s review of (a) Senile animal was predictably pathetic and halfassed, and it sounded like it was written before they even heard the record.
Also, i agree, Wolfmother is a half trick pony.
-C.
The main dude at Pitchfork wears ill-fitting Kohl’s button-up shirts and an $8 hairdo. He looks and acts like he provides technical support for the 16500C Logic Analysis System Mainframe.
This is not a dig on him, but on those who assume they’re a bunch of image-conscious hipsters. They’re just huge nerds who played their cards better than other zines.
That said, I’m still haunted by the 10 seconds of Joanna Newson I once heard.
Haunted as in “wow, that really is touching and thought-provoking” or haunted as in “DEAR GOD THE BLOOD THE BLOOD THE BLOOD!?!?!”
Look at me. Im posting links to iTunes!
Check out the little vocal ‘burp’ at the end of that sample. I think it shattered a glass on my desk.
We got Conan to comment! HELLZ YES *fist*
i just noticed something - does that “hat” have paws? ew.
“i realize there’s some sort of weird po-mo “indie kids like mainstream stuff too!â€
Yeah! That’s GOT to be it. Everyone’s just trying to fall into their little indie category! Oh, well, except you, of course.
“Except me” hell! I’m in the snarky-old-dude-who-doesn’t-get-the-Kids-These-Days category, and proud of it! Now get off my lawn!
You guys are crazy. Joanna Newsom is one of the most talented musicians around. You’ve probably never given her nough chance. Stupid hipsters.
I like her too but come on, if you’re gonna stick up for her, at least don’t do it anonymously.
Everyone’s so damn uppity. Just be glad they didn’t include “SexyBack” in this list (or did they?). I’ll go ahead and throw my first-place vote firmly behind (hehe) “My Love”. Never underestimate the complete shift in reality that can happen when for one brief moment “pop” is not synonymous with “shit.”
*Commence ripping limb-from-limb*
Joie–oh, it gets even better when you realize that the paws are… uh… strategically placed. Who’s designing these press shots–Victoria’s Secret?
I was going to say that the paws were the first thing I noticed, but perhaps I was just noticing the “strategic placement…”
before anyone gets too excited about exZAKtly’s wanna-be inflammatory comment, let me first point you in the direction of his profile. that is all.
So I’ve got another man-crush…sue me.
whatevs! I’ll throw all sorts of support behind the new justin timberlake album. i love it the same way i love the peeping tom album - it’s new, it’s innovative, it’s fucking brilliant, and it’s damn catchy.
anonymous - please note that my beef is not with her music. it is with her VOICE and her LOONEYTUNES PR ADVISOR.
Have any of you actually listened to Y’s? Oh, is that not a prerequisite? Hmmm, blogging is SO FUN. I hope someone is paying attention to me.
I used the 30-second preview clips on iTunes to clear my apartment of vermin. Does that count?
i have to agree… people who wear animal clothes is not a kind of people that i wanna to hear!
but i can wear joanna newson’s skin. after that I will hear her song.
duh!
Valium….
Detection time period for valium. Valium….
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Comment by joiezabel — December 19, 2006 @ 10:50 am
dude, you just cracked me up. i cannot stand joanna newsom. sometimes i feel like i\’m missing out on something and sometimes i feel like i lucked out, but either way i just. cannot. stand. her squeaky minnie mouse voice. wow, i just agreed with rolling stone. who knew?
i read that list of singles from pitchfork! at the disco last night. i approved of less than half of it. i can just see their writers getting together to brainstorm so they can \”put something on there for everybody.\” and end up pleasing no one, as the case usually goes.
i bet justin and joanna are happy though.